I have been going about 150 mph since school started in September, and I haven't even landed a full-time teaching position yet. I started the year with a long-term, 5-week sub position at one of the high schools. Sadly, I finish this job on Friday and I will dearly miss all the kids and my para-staff. I have been in a high needs special education classroom where I have kids that are in wheelchairs, some are autistic and some are very highly functioning, and all are super fantastic. I've been in this classroom before so it was easy to come in and start the year with them. Besides, I have some super awesome women who work in this class and they make all the difference in the world...way to go Kathy, Jacki, Jenny, Laura, and Marcelina!!!
I am starting a 3.5 month long-term position in a week teaching 6th grade LA and Social Studies, which is my endorsement area so I am looking forward to teaching a subject that I am really qualified to teach! It is going to be a bit of a shift from high school special needs to sixth graders.
I am still praying and holding firm to the calling God gave me to be a full-time teacher. Sometimes I still get discouraged that I started my fourth year of teaching this fall without landing a full-time position. However, God has been so faithful to provide for my every need...these long-term positions are surely a testament to His faithfulness. And I am blessed to know that I have made an impact on the lives of hundreds of students over the last three years. I still believe that He has the perfect position for me and that my prayers for a full-time job will be answered.
There are moments though that at age 38 (which just happened a few weeks ago) I don't feel adequate or worthy of God's blessing. I'm sure that there are people of every age that feel this way; however, God doesn't want you to EVER feel as if you don't deserve all the blessing He can pour out over you. I see God's blessing in so many aspects of my life and I feel overwhelmed that He has chosen ME!!! He provided a job this summer that paid bills until I got paid for teaching this fall (in fact, I have been able to keep this job throughout the school year by working on Saturdays and I think I'll be able to work during Christmas break!! The extra money is actually paying for me to go on vacation during Spring Break!), He provided me with long-term positions from the very first day of school this year. He has provided me with an awesome church family and He has blessed me with a house.
Due to a change in housing situation I have searching for a place to rent come Novemberish, and all the places I have been looking at are running pretty high and then you have to add in utilities and such. So I decided to take a leap of faith and see if I would qualify to buy a home. I meet with my friend who is a real estate agent and then meet with a mortgage broker just about three weeks ago to discuss my options. I was nervous and fearful about the situation...I honestly thought he would just laugh once he looked at my financial situation. BUT NO!!! He determined that I would qualify for a home loan. Flash forward to this last weekend and we went and looked at four houses...I feel in LOVE with the second one I saw. Bids were due by Monday night and by Tuesday I was told "Congratulations, Your bid was accepted"! I signed initial paperwork today and sent them overnight to start the ball rolling!
I AM BUYING A HOUSE!!
How crazy is that? I honestly didn't think it would go this fast but I prayed going in, "Lord, they will be done. If you want me to purchase a home open the door (and windows) of opportunity!" And by golly He has...in a BIG way! It hasn't sunk in yet and I am still feeling as if I just stepped over the thresh hold of adulthood. What is it about buying a home that makes a person feel as if they are finally a true member of the adulthood club. So weird....I know! I know it isn't an easy road as a homeowner. I know that it will have its ups and downs and I am more financially responsible then ever before...I know that I will need to find some roommates for the first few years....I know that there will days I will cry and days that I will over analyze ever step I've taken and wonder if I made the right decision. But I will NEVER question whether I am worthy enough or adequate enough to receive this special BLESSING, because I know that God loves me, watches out for me and loves to pour out blessings on His children. I stand here with open arms simply saying, "Thank You Abba Father!"